Let Bruises fade and Silence vanish -STORY

When silence crawls in the static space

Only to be recognized as Evil scattered in huge Mess

Silence

In dark room , when words echoes back,

It is only route left , unmoved and undesigned,

Charting every pros and cons to visualize.

Silence

Waiting to lapse in the memories left untouched,

Only to walk back to the world of pride and times vegenance,

Once wished to dredged , but in speculation of uncertainity

it get completely drenched .

Silence

You wished to forget those feud buried into hatchet,

Sorry is situation to face every moment of predicament,

But was it meant to escape or just getting drained in moment of inconceivable pain……?

Alas!! Silence

STORY

He was happy, wasn’t he suppose to be ? Love and Longevity that they nourished is about to complete one year ,so very against everyone believe and wish : be it friends and even family., The eventual moment after a catastrophic trouble ,the day worth wait against all odds , a love story to vouch for, and a magnificent tale to share , 've come ,their first marriage Anniversary.

The party hall was trickling with the guests all brimming with their smiling faces and gifts alike , commotion was to peak and buzz to maximum, everthing was perfect except the missing lady of the Eve Neha ,wife of Nishant , where is she ? every eyes in hall was seeking her rather desperately searching , Nishant too at every distance voice at entrance gate was earnestly awaiting for his spouse eagerly ,heartily………So were other guests:

Lady 1: "Today is Nishant and Neha's first Marriage Anniversary".

Lady2:" Nishant is looking quite happy , but then where is Neha ?"

Lady1: "I guess , She must be getting ready after all today is special day for both of them …".

Back there at personal room ,a demure , in her mid twenties , was gazing in the void, SILENCE……only silence pertaining in that absolute quiet and dimmed room….if anything was breaking that sharp dreaded numbness on momentarly lapse it was sobbing sound nothing could be palpable except images darker than the word darkness , just so analogus to hidden nasty secrets adornished in embellished box, its suppose to be left UNTOUCHED because it would baffle ,and spread more VEGENANCE, once unlided , opened to put forth on the platter for visibility.

Suddenly Neha opens door , standing stiff and nonchalantly , in deep dark black Salwaar kameez her face looked so decisive minus any add-ons like makeup or accessories ,simple but definitely not serene , with her luggage bag by her side ;narrating complete different story to divulge.

‘Beauty can never be constant’ truly so well transcended in old axiom falls perfectly on her . Neha , a girl most vivacious and bubbly , most sought of , synonymous to LIFE , living , laughing , liking every facet of it , Looks that she possessed was so difficult to ignore but definitely easiest to retain in memory , her eyes so deep , her glance more slippery to hold , her face most vibrant to retreat .That was how and when THEY met , meticulously playing the game of fleeing , flirting , teasing ,retreating , courtship ,eloping and eventually Marriage.

Party room was pulsating and trembling with uthermost vigour and energy emerging to pinnacle. When suddenly Neha seemed visible ,at other end of staircase, slowly and quietly coming down from it , one reaching straight down to party hall , all eyes gouging and inquiring to each other with changing interval to Nishant and unapproachable look of her , which was devoiding any eye contact to anyone ther ; her gaze and words so especially meant for someone really special , so very specially directed and owned to Nishant and only Him for some very special reasons .

She came closed to Nishant , his eyes blankly looking into her eyes , warning her against any probable mistake, his innocent and chivalrous conduct took a U turn to bleary and devastating mode , apprehensively questioning her unexpected action …..he grasped her wrist in order to take her to sides to clarify , ….there came a bolt from blue , she shruddered him from her hand , and denounced the ultimate statement , one jittered every presence , and shocked every human existing in that room.

"Neha what is this drama , why creating scene out of nothing , whats this nonsense ?" said Nishant

"Whattt did you said ? Scene , Drama , Nonsense ? Exactly ! whats that ? thats is my Life and this is my Decision." replied Neha

"I don’t deserve this nonsense today , I don’t deserve your childish acts rather I don’t deserve you ." yield Nishant

“You don’t deserve me…..”she said wailing

“You are so right you donn’t deserve me , rather you deserve none.” she shouted

“No women can take your constant violence and disrespect , No one …..not even me. "

“That’s why am leaving you , today, now for Ever.”

A year of trauma and pain , and eventual SILENCE couldn’t ever never surged so much perfection and peace in demonstrating containment , relieve and satisfaction to Neha what it did that very moment , times standing against and speaking against domestic violence is only solution recommended not hiding or eluding , because Bruises fade but pain lasts forever.

“Now its up to you to decide over Silence ……………"

This story is dedication to all women in India and world around who had interfaced Domestic Violence at one or any time of their life or say still consistently fighting against it , Crusade that they are paving against women battering and physical abuse…Hats off to those , Hats off to those FIGHTER ………….

LIFE -A PANDORA BOX

"As Pandora raised the lid, the cottage grew very dark; for the black cloud had now swept

quite over the sun and seemed to have buried it alive. There had, for a little while past, been a low growling and muttering which all at once broke into a heavy peal of thunder. But Pandora,

unmindful of all this, lifted the lid nearly upright and looked inside. It seemed as if a sudden

swarm of winged creatures brushed past her, taking flight out of the box,. while at the same

instant she heard Epimetheus calling as if in pain.

"Oh, I am stung!' he cried. I am stung! Naughty Pandora! why have you opened this wicked box?"

LIFE is so truly , epitomization of Pandora box…….first we are unhappy because we want to know what lays in future ,engulfed in ugly charm of Curosity …mostly one that is expected to remain cagey ….best left untouched , untampered .

Then unhappiness….tame us to something that is offspring of the curiosity , one which we had invited and we make every stone unturn to get things in chronological order ….and when we are done with it , we realize that suppose aim was not worth chase , it was not what we wanted eventually…..

"Pandora Box " , one story that ‘ve always facinated me……through out my growing years…….I always wondered how those evil creatures in external form would had looked like as …..I mean how can those devilish elements ..more so in abstact form would represent e.g sorrow , hate , jeolousy , greed , envy , cruelty ,but then life do give everyone a chance to undergo actual manifestation of all its facet say GOOD or BAD , it depicts in every persistant gamut of our day to day life , you come across them everyday and every moment , be it in strange crouds , familiar faces , unacquainted group , contemporary circuit , just scan your eyes and you would realize , its so pervasive , times subtle but definately omnipresent in our surroundings . But we must Thank the Almighty God atleast with vices around there are virtue too , one that balances out all negative stimulants to surged in positive ….one so beautifully mentioned at the end of Pandora box story-

"Pray, who are you, beautiful creature?" inquired Pandora. "I am to be called Hope!"

answered the sunshiny figure. "And because I am such a cheery little body, I was packed into the box to make up for that swarm of ugly Troubles which was to be let loose."

"Your wings are colored like the rainbow!" exclaimed Pandora. "How very beautiful !"

"And will you stay with us," asked Epimetheus, "for ever and ever?"

"As long as you need me," said hope, with her pleasant smile, "and that will be as long as you live in the world. I promise never to leave you. There may be times now and then when you will think that I have vanished. But again, and again, and again, when perhaps you least dream of my being with you, you shall see the glimmer of my wings on the ceiling of your cottage."

Consequently the beauty of the parable was indeed inspirational ……. Pandora Box , apart from introducing world to vicissitudes and life challenges it also paved way to something we all know and believe heartily e.g HOPE , feasiabilty of optimisim...mantra of survival.

WISHLIST

The city of my Dream,

One , that I am searching in the heap.

With every passing faces in the crowd;

I look for the resemblance to mould.

A world free from the shackles of crime,

Salvation , coming in true sense of life;

Adulation enlightening in every heart,

Undulating country sight , far away from the bemusing citylight.

Shelter given in the hope , indifferent to lies,

A debateless hideout , for every complacency ,

No feud , no crude , only serenity buzzing throughout .

I envision an equality of soceity , a realm where ,

Women is no more a hostage rather liberated , subtelety suffused;

Where muddling of past and futures is well analysed ,

Modernity well knitted with traditionality ,finally contextualized.

Respect and Love where flow to the fullest ,

Nothing coming against this pretext,

Inclination to fake have no place , ruination too must ‘ve no space.

Alas ! I still reinterpretate,

The city of my dream,

One, that I am searching in the heap.

SORRY STATE !!!!!!!!!!!

Few weeks back I went to bank with my close friend.what need a mention here is not the visit of the financial transaction centre but the incident that gave answer to my month old frustration ,one that have engulfed not only me but also every student who find themselves at the threshold of the life’s crossroad, a journey still dangling in uncertainity, Recession,one that have affected both students and professionals alike , those dreamt of desent job are wondering wheather they would ever come out of this Jobless slot and others who had jobs are making every stone unturn in order to save there proposition , situation is same for everyone difficult but only difference lies is in the disposition , ways to brace in these troubled water , looming large in everyone’s uncertain and pessimist life , struggling in the Sorry state ,where faults lies of no one still ,result ends to an untold and undirected punishment to everyone .

So the whole incident goes this way, I and my friend was busy with those paper work in the bank, standing in the queue for our turn to get the cash withdrawal ,from there suddenly I got the gaze on a man (around in his mid twenty) from outside cash withdrawl window ; he actually was in this compartment chamber the only thing that was making him different from other guys, from his contemporary was the fact that he was Handicapped , he couldn’t walk like normal boys rather it was obvious that he was affected with polio that had made him unable to lean , stand or walk , infact dragging and lugging hard on floor with his hand to make his way ,his dressing and attire was also making me track that his financial status was below average rather more appropiate he was representing india’s largest section of economic disparity haves and havesnot ,people living between poverty and lower middle class tag.

Well I felt to give the description of this person because it have a very significant reasoning behind , anyways , in midst of everything one specific difference about his physical aspect that took my attention and latter the whole importance that is knitted around this Mr X charm ,was his unbeatable and untouchable optimism and ‘smile’ in form of pride and confidence this person had been exburencing through out my observational watch on him , which he wouldn’t ever sense for second that I was….. ,I still have a strong face remembrance of the person even after a month , not because he was handsome or very intelligent but simply because he knew the art of being happy and selfrespecting even in worst adversities; for simple biasness that even I m having tough time in imbibing this virtue one quality most required in my life Now…which still is distance dream in the turbulence; my eyes was following him for simple reason that his confidence and love for himself was unmissable ,portrating the very typical fight against life unfarity , as challenging god and entire world that nothing can curb his rapturous SMILE .

I was just wondering what was he doing in the room , then suddenly Bank Teller barge in my thought with a question ,finally after the cash withdrawl ,when I was about to get my passbook entry done there again I got him in the way , actually he was demanding answers to some of his queries that was feeded to him by lady staff but without any success, in the very process he too headed for the passbook entry but the only difference and favour the person getting over me (which I am happy to say I was not …)that he was not following the bank queue .

I and my friend finally was done with all our tasks related to our bank visit , when we decided to sit for some minutes , I again found him , while we were heading for the couch sofa , to my surprise , he just raised his passbook supported with a question directed to me , I was really taken a back by his question it was least expected afterall, I hardly heard what he said as my eyes were fixed on his face , but definitely gave way to my friend as though, I didn’t heard his question , my friend took over his doubt that was actually related to some Debit entry in passbook ,once it was quenched , he with brimming satisfaction headed to the bank gate.

During the whole process, I was just thinking and retrospecting about this person wondering how life mean to him ,comparing who is more unlucky me for passing my most imperative and lucrative MBA years in the world worst Recession and uncorrectable economic phase or this person who living( what I reckon as most unluckiest thing in life to happen )under curseful state of not god’s say in name of destiny but sheer mistake of his parents for not getting him POLIO drops , weighing the intensity of happiness and optimism we both reflected on our faces , though definitely he was clear winner there , as it would take me years to learn the kind of dignity he was transcending , it was so Beautiful , I kept gouging hard if ever for a second I could discover that embrassment or consciousness those streak of unhappiness , complain to either almighty or even to people who so many times force you think negative but alas !!!! I could not .

I cann’t say how much he inspired me to become positive and better quoted in verbiage of word Optimist , but surely he turned one leaf of my self-occoupied life ,where Me and my problems had more and bigger space , there I gave space to a thought , one that I always believed and supported for, the only thing that keep interfacing is that you tend to forget it in cloud of your viccitudes and problems – that God has always been kind to me, be it past , present and even expecting best in future.So the sorry state I beholded for someone who hardly thinks his life to be sorryful ,one who loves life and its cruelty with his arms embracing its every facet good , ahh!!! I don’t think so , it was only bad and bad , atleast I can say that with his face charm.

ILLUSIONS

I woke up with a dream in my eyes,

Missing moments of my life , with cries in my stride ,

Scared with your absence , still so pervasive in my mind .

Retrospecting every minute and second you steal;

But tormentation donn’t let me go off your smile;

Imagination never crossing your cajole heal,

Bestowing craving of my lonely drive .

Your embrace, lull me into a world of lies ,

Not present but future getting sunk into the plight ;

I woke up with a dream in my eyes ,

Missing moments of my life , with cries in my stride .

Elegant were the days ,when you were by my side;

Sweet was your smell ,tickling your touch , metreical your words,

Special was your facination ; Cascading your influence ,

Scared with your absence , still so pervasive in my mind .

Flattering is your praise , laudable your warmth ,

Deriving my vaccum with clang , How I miss those charms ;

Cliquey it seemed to people outside , but cosy it was to lapse in your arm.

But then I know you were never there , only illusions ...........everywhere……………!

What's in the Name?

Recently I was on my hometown trip…..had blast in my very style… lots of fun and masti ….sleeping most days after getting time from watching movies and yes family gatherings and tittle-tattle making it an endless chatting and other conversation on odd topics.

From here comes offspring of such discussion , topic of my blog ….little subtle , less talked about and definitely worth scribbling ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, 'Name'

It came from the discussion between my parents and lady X that for a minute complexed me rather pushed my logical capability to think for the first time and rack over their point, yes I mean a point unnoticed by most of us. How many of us have thought a name could bring ……….likeness and dislikeness not from budding days or coming of an age but after passing many ages , close to the end ,at the touch of senility Pet Names like Guria , babloo , guddu tunni etc etc or names resembling to these can bring…….. groveling behaviour may be crinkling affect around your eyes or raise on your eyebrows , it all depends , could be an act of dropping a brick anything as I said it just depends on how you take it
How would you visualize yourself being called by your loved ones at an old age with this cheesy and puerile and child-like pet names ; contradicting very temperament of the word ,challenging every facet of its existence :What am I speaking about ????? donn’t worry its all knitted around the blog title but need little exaggeration ; for instance old lady being called Guria at an age of sixty around , if illusioned it makes situation very funny and sarcastic , donn’t believe me!!!!! Then start imagining yourself with the name you pleasure most ….


So “ What's in a name? That which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet.…….”
For many years I hated my formal name without knowing its meaning.I wondered why on earth my parents gave me a name , restlessly searching its origination or any extranneous knowledge related to it without much success ,though with every passing day it deepen aversion and embrassing moments ,until then I came to know the beautiful meaning it clinged with ' Anju' (my name)….”one who lives in heart” I cann’t tell how much I felt relieved and exulted finally got reason to love it, indeed celebrate a cause that my name message this world around LOVE ...... a word ;enamored with life and presence ;liking with acceptance .You all be thinking I am glorifying my name without any deed …….ahhh how frivolous !!!!! then answer is simple No…..still cann’t clarify how not ? times answers are inexplicable…….but yes these goes around my earlier life when Anju sounded to me too oldie and antic , unusual from my contemporaries and other selected few whose name were on same lyrical mode like sanju , manju and other XYZ metrical title tone ……I almost hated it why not like others ,those ‘wannabe’ names unique in itself , hard hitter with first click ……names with originating from Sanskrit or one with beautiful poetical theme those letting you to the the world of abstract horizon….why not them why ANJU . Though I could sense the subsequent benefit of it….. name of these domestic relevance tinge with familiarity instant memory fervour attached to them always put me on an advantageous side of owning a NAME !!!!! that was easiest to remember in the group still most difficult to forget ……lovely naaaa …….I guess the reminiscence could be tortured for many who know me ……[:)] So there I got saved from being lost in croud , without any extra ounch lost in toiling process.Sometime back I read “The Importance of Being Earnest” a Play by Oscar Wilde, must referred story at this junction of my blog , cann’t stop myself from mentioning the characters ‘Cecily’ and ‘Gwendolen’ and their frenzy and desperate attempt in play over the name and love of name Ernest(name of character) is worth quoting ……that gives crux of the matter for this romantic-commedy of its time “Is it important to be Earnest in love or Ernest?”. Precisely like the forgoing line ,Life too makes name’s vitality engulfed around earnest. Atleast I think so.

We all love our name sometimes other’s but one thing is sure , we hardly goes off the moment when we are not surrounded with these very essence of the identity .

How many times we came across names that we just love it on first strike or times those who test our patience in remembering the tongue twisting pronunciation , words combination or say that which work for you because they dispatch with your everyday dwelling on them ( friends name whose name you called and cite more than your own)finally those names that just let us pave the way to our earlier recollection of memories , connecting with names you loved for your personnal biasness .Whatever is the case it plays a very imperative entity that cast around people of our acquaintance and other of unknown , confronting situation and emotions that tamper with this source of image identity some liked other disliked, names that freshen our tangling expression of past.

MYTH

Film fascinates me !!! true it recharge a new energy and life , in my veins……now you would ask me,…..whats a big deal in that ? film in Indian is a cult, people talk , breath , sleep , eat it !!!!! then to this, my answer would be………….for me its more than that creating a new caricature in my mind . It surge a world that mould in my imagination and heart , a dream nutured and recreated in the very way the movie move and sway. That’s why I decided to write something which is very close to my heart , FILM especfically Bollywood

Everytime I see it , I feel myself one among the story character….the way things move bound me to fell it , live it nay dazzling my soul with it , have you ever felt while watching a movie from at an edge of your seat……you reckoning hard how it feel being in place of the protagonist , going through its emotions as perfectly and closely as supposedly you playing the part in it ? humming the lyrics and music as though you still hear background score in the backdrop ? Silly !!!! I sound naa but truth lies in all your’s deep skin ………or after the end of the movie analyzing every pros and cons not just the director’s work but also the supposed acts and reacts of the characters by putting yourself in their shoes …….What would I have done ??? if was to be , in her/his place, all you might say that its just a another figment of my imagination then……answer still I feel lie in all our Indian heart…..

I donn’t believe that movies have any language.It wonders me more when , comprehensibilty of my capability is challenged rather crafted , its all in the way one see it through .

Being just a novice in the topic of the conversation , I know I might sound unjustified to lot of people there , but then I still choosed to act on the rajor’s edge of my vexed opinion.I always wonder why Indian cinema is made synonmon to typical BOLLYWOOD masala…….which is all about keeping your brain back home when you wish to watch a hit n successful bollywood masala…with due respect to all those biggies and intellectuals of the film fraternity I completely disagrees to all those who Agrees to it………How can one keep his mind and reasoning out ? when it evokes them most. Movies are the mirror of culture and region it belongs , accepted , but most to the people and society it caters to , I never like those movie which have nothing intense to grip with only those fake fight scenes and to that of pathetic fusion of everthing , from commic , drama , rommance , tragedy , action , not to forget erotica (desperate attempt to coerced in those errotic scene) still in perplexity NOTHING , minimum concrete in nutshell….. Yes , it is one part of the whole enterprise…not…. whole Bollywood itself.

This is Bollywood in which we all have born and brought up in……a Genre that is so typically Indian that willingly or unwillingly no one even dares to copy and cheat….coated in beauty of word ‘inspiration’

With these they say its all about Indian ‘ typical’ cinema . I would say no India had and have plenty of such example to nullify these belief of saying Indian movies especially old and classic cinema to be such….

Classic that is my all time favroriate , a pick out of countless collection , cannalized and illustrating to delve deep into the issue , Do Ankhen Barah Hath by V. Shantram , ultimate wizadry in his domain…the story was not masala as irrespective to what our industry is described in most international forums ,it is a short of parable that revolves around a man who dares to make a change , standing and acting against the wind , one who tries to reform the forbidden six , Prisionors , and eventually edifying Society …..and this is just the tip of an iceberg…..be it Bandini , Do bigha Zameen , Pather Panchali , Pyaasa , Sujata , Mother India …….. and the legendry list could go on and on on……

Because there are abundant example in Indian film cinema to prove that our is Cinema that is territorial venture of amalgamation of expressions that touches and counters across all nations , boundaries , time ,ages ,culture , tradition , religion , beliefs etc . Then why they still say its confined to its conservative style of only dance and music , ofcourse length that is long enough to test your patience……… Nevertheless , if we can appreciate Hollywood with their style syndrome e.g the culture portrayed that is times too raunchy ; captivating it is with script and technology ( but then the answer lies in the fact that Hollywood have backup from very rich economy and funding that opens a new vistas and platform to experiment with new idea ) ; and concepts little alien ; but Indians(especially youth ) love it…….the point that I want to make here is that if we can embrace west with all there imperfections why cann’t they…why this nagging still
exists ??

Time is changing so is movies in India and the League of new breed of Directors who too have braced themselfves for metamorphose and ushering of this change of Indian film industry with more contemporary context (following better say copying Hollywood style )……….BUT then this most popularly used adjective still date ‘Bollywood masala’ , inappropriate which I still feel , is a MYTH that continues to occupy and retain in people minds both in and out of Indian soil.